Join the conversation!, the Cluetrain Manifesto said. And every year new businesses / bloggers / young professionals hop eagerly aboard, charging into your blog comments / presentations / conferences to say:
“Hi! Great post / talk / point. Could you answer a question you already answered in it? Here’s something you said, restated in a slightly different way. Now, could you do something for me? This task, or that task, that has no clear benefit to you, and by the way, visit my website at www.mywebsite.com. Thanks! Great post! Bye!”
A-wha? Clearly, this isn’t the way anyone wants to come off, but all too often people in a hurry to “participate” (promote) leave only a sense of vapid selfishness behind, at best annoying those they interacted with.
But there are ways to accomplish your goals and provide value to the people you interact with. The web really is a conversation, sometimes slower paced, sometimes a massive interaction of hundreds of people at once. Just like real conversations, one of the most important things to do before joining in is to listen, and listen carefully. Many of the misguided blog comments I’ve seen don’t even use (or know) the blog author’s name. Listening is about more than understanding the topic; it’s about understanding the speaker’s perspective on it, and opportunities to provide value to both him and his other listeners.
Ways to Add Value
Once you’ve taken the time to be mindful of the context of a conversation, you still have the problem of how to think of something valuable to say. One of the best frameworks is the Six Ws: Who, What, When, Where, Why, and How?
- Who? – Putting a human face on a situation, talking about how someone has / is dealing with it. Sometimes who is you; personal anecdotes that illustrate a point from the discussion (or one of your own), are enjoyable to read.
- What? – Most of the time this is the conversation itself, but sometimes (particularly objective news reports or press releases), there’s opportunity to turn information into meaning. “What does this mean?” is a question many people want answers to.
- When? – What’s the time context around this topic? Has it come up before? Were there previous discussions / events that you can point out as related? (It’s even better to synopsize points from these previous discussions that haven’t come up in this one.)
- Where? – What’s the geographic context? Can you provide a local angle / anecdote? Or identify similar conditions that make the topic / event relevant in other locations?
- Why? – What are the further considerations around a topic (e.g. who gains / loses)? Why is all about using your natural intelligence, logic, and experience to add insight.
- How? – What led to this? What factors contributed? What is the actual process (if it’s one many aren’t familiar with)?
Essentially, I look for a question that the discussion hasn’t covered yet, and try to answer it. Sometimes it’s valuable just to ask the question, but you have to be more careful with this — it can come across as superior, or imply that the conversation starter hasn’t gone to enough effort to supply more information. They key is to contribute something because you think it will be valuable to those involved, not just to contribute.
Join the conversation. And say something worth hearing.
Update (04/05/10): Browsing through my feeds, I found a video by Darren Rowse of Problogger, energetically providing ideas on the same topic. The last minute or so raises a point I don’t cover in this post, talking about the utility of “What if?” as a way to add value:


Today I’m at Real Estate BarCamp Boston, connecting with industry techies, vendors, and agents. One presentation, one interview, and many introductions later, I’m done with the scheduled sessions and off to enjoy some pizza and networking. If video of the presentation or interview become available, I’ll link to it here. Thanks to everyone I met for great conversations; please check out my 
This Saturday and Sunday, “BarCampBoston4″:http://www.barcampboston.org/ is happening at MIT! It’s a fantastic geek unconference, with close to 400 attendees networking, eating, and participating in sessions on everything from _Rapid Application Development_ to _Entrepreneurs Anonymous_ to _Battlestar Galactica: The Aftermath_. The main thing I’m thinking about is… what am _I_ going to present on?

After attempting to determine which of the nearly 700 feeds I’m subscribed to I should keep, based on what my sketchy memory tells me about how often each of them has provided any kind of value, I’ve decided to finally move on from Bloglines as a feedreader. I’m hammering on another link in the chain of “Google’s Information Ecosystem”:http://socialstrategist.com/2007/07/08/the-google-information-ecosystem, and switching to Google Reader. It doesn’t have all the analytics I’d like (# of links I click by feed, for instance), but its “Trends”:http://googlereader.blogspot.com/2007/01/i-like-big-charts-and-i-cannot-lie.html feature at least shows me which feeds I’m actually reading (and some other nifty data). Google Reader isn’t the only tool that’s enlightening me about my habits…
“RescueTime”:http://www.rescuetime.com/ is something I decided to give a try this year, and it’s been tremendously helpful in showing me where I spend my time on the PC. “Mint”:http://www.mint.com is to my money what RescueTime is to my time. And one of my fondest wishes is for GMail to get some kind of Xobni or ClearContext-like functionality that will show me who my most frequent contacts and conversation subjects are. The best thing about these apps is that they don’t require any effort on my part past installing them. No data entry, no tagging (though I can, if I want to improve the already very good results), they *track my naturally occurring actions without me having to think about it*. That means I can spend my time on gaining insight, not measuring usage.

